—Girl With A Poppyseed Dear GWAP, I’m so sorry you’re in this situation.
How can I navigate this and stay true to myself but consider his feelings, given our polarized moral compasses?
I have had terrible luck dating in my 20s until recently.
I met an amazing guy and felt an immediate connection to him.
While you can’t change your partner or her addiction, you can change your relationship patterns.
You can decide to draw a hard line in the sand, as heartbreaking as it is.“The best she can do to help is try to talk to a drug counselor about how to become a non-enabling support person,” my friend advised.
Even with your conflicting stances on abortion, it may help you to know that this is a common predicament—one person wants to keep the child and the other does not. Keep the baby and prepare to raise them as a single parent, with help from whatever current support systems you have—family, friends, community.2.
Am I an idiot for continuing this pattern or do you think there's any hope for this relationship? Dear Anon., You’re not an idiot, but you need to break up with her.It’s really easy to place the blame on a vaguely menacing platitude (“Women date jerks! ”) than it is to, say, pursue the kinds of changes that would help you find the succulent rewards and fulfilled life you seek. Let go of unhelpful thoughts and gender stereotypes that don’t serve you, and focus on commanding your own unique bliss. If not, do some research on your own or ask trusted family members or friends for their recommendations.As you discuss things with a counselor, keep your ex in the loop and keep inviting him to join you on these visits. He might be in shock right now—it is pretty terrible timing, admittedly—and he may need a minute to process his feelings before he comes to terms with what’s what.